gator

People often ask me how I do it How can you remain calm and stay unfazed by all the bullshit? I tell 'em all the same thang I never give a f*ck about what they think I've been on a mission tryna find peace within myself I got a lot inside this twisted mind of mine I'm fighting demons all the time I've been tryna keep my composure I've been tryna stand my ground But it's really hard when a lot of people tryna knock you to the ground Friends switched up Momma starting to have her doubts Locked myself away that night and cried my fucking eyes out But my lady told me "Calm down I'm here everything gon' be alright now" Don't know what I'd do without her she deserves more than some flowers and the same 3 words I tell her damn near everyday I love you Not even my family tells me that shit and I've been quick to jump into shit It got me pondering about what I could've done for them to no longer want me around Yeah no longer want me to come down and visit You claiming that you love me I need to ask my girl to hug me since y'all never wanna comfort me I've never felt safe inside my so called home I've been alone most of the time hiding all the pain I hold inside Breaking down day at a time Don't know how much longer until I break Until I break and tears start flowing down my face I have a fear of doing too much I have a fear of doing too much, most of the times I feel like I'm doing too much I'm constantly apologizing to my lady She assures me that everything is good and never worry As I would never be too much for her but yet I still have a feeling that's inside my gut That one day she's gonna feel like she's had enough and pack her shit and leave me in a rut I know you said you love me baby And I love you too But it's just a thought I can't help Dread the day that I wind up losing you Hope that nightmare doesn't blossom up into truth