i feel off

I'm so Cold I don't know why I'm all Over Skin is so dry Usually my Insides are warm But I'm Ice Right now It's all over In my head Before I start I'm Filled with the Dread Usually Im too afraid But I am Brave right now Maybe it's the winter Maybe it's the weather I can't breathe any longer Without freezing Maybe I'm a lover Should I stay and fight Am I lost without you am I just Buying time Alone I have to stay warm And I'm fine being The sad soul in a crowd In the storm Tell me why do I suffer While others can sigh at the moon Prove to myself that I'm ok Living alongside my pain Like a heartbreak Like a whole week Without your lover Prove to the world that's its alright Raise both my arms and put up a fight Till I'm okay Till the whole day Is passed and I lived There's a place That I go every time A little pill made of water I sit inside The sounds are smoother here than I remember The dreams I've had don't make any sense harder to understand than my awake head And all I can say in the heat of the moment Is I feel lost I feel off I feel lost Older than I should be For the years that I've been living