I'm Sorry

I'm sorry I can't seem to drown them out I'm sorry Their voices in my head Like toxic venom, sorry All the conditioning The religious teaching, sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I wish I was further along In my journey I wish I could be strong And block out all my worries God I want to stay But oh my mind is swirling Down the drain from all the pain I'm scared to have a son They say without a dad He'll be broken Is this really what God wants? For us to raise 4 kids as just two moms? How do I tell the love of my life I'm scared about the afterlife If she becomes my wife? How do I say I'm terrified To be the reason my children Are treated different? I'm sorry I'm on the ledge no looking down I'm sorry Thought I'd have me figured out by now I'm sorry I wish I was further along in my journey I wish I could be strong And block out all my worries God I want to stay But oh my mind is swirling Down the drain from all the pain I'm scared to have a son They say without a dad he'll be broken Is this really what God wants? For us to raise 4 kids as just two moms? How do I tell the love of my life I'm scared about the afterlife If she becomes my wife? How do I say I'm terrified To be the reason My children are treated different? Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! I'm scared! (I'm scared) I'm scared! (I'm scared, I'm scared, I'm scared) But oh I'm scared! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Sorry! I'm sorry! But I I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! But I still believe their lies