closed doors

Say less Reminder you've already lost your integrity Judge depend on my age and tell me to keep it real real PG Negativity's a human thing and I'mma express it unfortunately So when I do it in my own way, better cover the ears of your babies I thought I could handle it well but damn I just lost it all again Sometimes I just wish to have my own state of mind and get rid of all that intricate shit I could've been stopped hoping and wishing but now I'm just pretending that way Somewhere quiet, somewhere dead, I'mma run away I ain't mind a bit I put my sweat and tears into this shit Can you feel it when I'm getting this real? People would think I'm funny Show some respect when I'm expressing my feels So don't pull up to me with all that laughter I hate speculating words when you're fake I rather stay with a house of tigers Then being in the same room with one snake Negativity makes me blind Late night writing this shit tryna let go from my mind But if that's easy I wouldn't be this sad, then mad, then get crazier instead Give me a dose of tears so that I can get on with my life Uh Look what they've forced me into, turned me into, have no chance to look back Your words to me feels like projections Your love to me feels like expectations Your lines to me feels like strings for abduction Sorry that scares y'all with no exceptions I used to hide But now I display them exhibition Cause when I'm happy smiling Behind closed doors, All I do is falling, crying, struggling, Sorry... I'm sorry I'm really sorry Know this life ain't suppose to be sweet Everyone here just for what they need Fine if that's my fault I'll take it with full will But next time can the price be cheaper? Cause I'm sick of going to bed using NyQuil People say I would never gon' fall But when I scream they never have helped Not a matter of cold-blooded Matter of kind It's just that they don't care People point their fingers but looking twice Just stop thinking about it all night They say you need to learn to love yourself Be yourself or you will never feel loved But the truth ain't sweet like fiction Heartless is now the mindset that I long Learn to f*ck their opinions F*ck their feelings F*ck their perspectives No one can judge me but me Before I find my real self Don't expect humble from me It takes a single mouth to talk shit But takes character and strength to care That's why I ain't mind a fucking bit Cause when they don't love me back it's unfair Funny how I got tricked by people all the time Crave attention, but got hurt in the end Maybe I'm just sensitive, who understand? Maybe just a process... I'm gon' be fine You don't care, cause you're living in your greenhouse But soon you will know what I'm talking about Cause now I stuck in this nowhere mess Laughing, but you never know when's your turn somehow Your words to me feels like projections Your love to me feels like expectations Your lines to me feels like strings for abduction Sorry that scares y'all with no exceptions I used to hide But now I display them exhibition Cause when I'm happy smiling Behind closed doors, All I do is falling, crying, struggling, Sorry... Just like I said You would never going to be able to satisfy everybody's wants and needs So if you always believe what others say about you You just gon' lose yourself for real Know this life ain't suppose to be sweet Everyone here just for what they need Fine if that's my fault I'll take it with full will But next time can the price be cheaper? Cause I'm sick of going to bed using NyQuil People say I would never gon' fall But when I scream they never have helped People say I would never gon' fall But when I scream they never have helped People say I would never gon' fall But when I scream they never have helped