Don't Even Ask

It was not all my fault Yeah I made decisions But I ain't know What was gonna happen I ain't know You would be my end Or that my love life Would end so soon You'd never leave my head Ain't know this was something You could do When I'm lonely I just roll up Feel lucky if I show up You ask me for closure I f*ck away your composure And ask you afterwards If you sure you wanna go Cause you told all your friends And already used they shoulder I could be what you need But just not when I'm sober Said I was too aggressive I haven't touched you in so long You needed space from me For space for him That shit is fucked up I been with you But ain't been in love And this shit so wrong I been riding with you But I know you been Hopped off F*ck that Take my top off I'm out of my bag I'm insecure from staying with you And trusting you was all my fault I just take that shit to the chin It's easy to sin Fucked her friend cause The hurt is harder to dust off I keep my walls up My imaginary Glock full In case somebody tryna Make me fall in love son Never again no no I remember being the victim You don't even know it When you in the position They playing you and she Just fucking the opposition Just to prove a point They got one over Friends are switching Haven't talked to family In so long like they went missing I think about it And I start tripping How we share blood But water creates distance I been tryna spread love Like this shit my mission Cause I knew what it was When it felt nonexistent And no I don't trust And many reasons persist But these bitches they just be Doing that shit assistance Why you want me involved In a competition Why does this have To be a system I give you what you want And what you need In an instant But where were you When I went ballistic When my mind was really twisted And the memories Were twisting The truth into knots And the pain wouldn't stop Tell me where were you When the nightmares Were consistent And I couldn't sleep And I couldn't focus My mind would just zone out Cause it know here is broken My fears were silent My frustration was vocal Did you know since a kid I could never open Did you know That you were my only confidant Did you know Before you I was already hopeless Did you know That you actually made me happy So much That even everybody else noticed I know you were strong But you weren't made To handle me at my lowest Every time I think about it And I think about how I hurt you I close my eyes And take a toke More potent