january/find the words

My head feels clearer now I still dream of standing at your door The work is all over It's time to go home and start again But I can't comprehend starting anything new without you I can't comprehend starting again without you I think most people would call it sad The way I keep trying to replace you None of it vengeful, and all accidental Every beautiful thing takes up a space in my brain That used to be a bedroom for you Every day that I'm without you seems to make the aching grow A public stoning as the crowd begins to show Hard rock that hits my lungs as I breathe myself to sleep And I'm not with you I'm nowhere near you Am I romanticizing? Can I trust a single thought in my brain? I haven't felt his eyes in too long Feels like I'm going fucking insane I'll find the words Messy and pleading And most of it love I'll find the words For everything, everything I did And failed to do I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm sorry