All I Got for Christmas Was Stoned

I love these holiday parties How’s the job? How’s the 401K? Getting cornered by my old pastor Demanding answers about my lost faith Oh great. I think that’s my ex and she’s here with some guy I hate Named Greg who’s a lawyer All I want Is just a chance to slip outside Yeah, I’d trade in all my gifts to go get high I swear I won’t care If I end up all alone And all I got for Christmas was stoned Another family gathering (why god why?) With all these people whose names I don’t know I couldn’t tell you how we’re all related But I could tell you who’s here just for show Oh no. Now someone’s drunk uncle just used some words he don’t know Are super fucking racist (oh c’mon he fucking knows) All I want Is just a chance to slip outside Yeah, I’d trade in all my gifts to go get high I swear I won’t care If I end up all alone And all I got for Christmas was stoned And all I got for Christmas was stoned Stoned on sativa (Not Indica) All I got for Christmas was stoned (Higher than the top of the tree) All I got for Christmas was stoned (Please stop talking to me) [Ho, ho, ho this party fucking blows] All I got for Christmas was stoned (Santa, suck my dick) All I got for Christmas was stoned (This room’s full of pricks) All I got for Christmas was stoned (I’m about to smoke the mistletoe up in this bitch) All I got for Christmas was stoned