Consequences

What you callin' me for I don't know you, I don't need you tellin me what I need I need patience, I need freedom, I need deliverance From my pride and my ego From my lack of self-discipline I need all the life's cheat codes I need somebody who cares I need somebody who loves me Need someone that'll stay when they see my sides that are ugly I need someone who's not perfect, and won't expect perfect from me Someone who's gonna turn heads and make my friends say I'm lucky I need a wife I want that butterfly feelin I want that teenager rush When touched get pumped with adrenaline That 24-7 crush get so in love that it's sickening' We split it 50-50 Need that other half that I'm missin That other half of me that won't have second thoughts about dippin' Someone modest who don't go show half herself for attention Yet so exotic, people just can't figure out how she's gifted Not that she isn't, she just different from all the competition Guess that's my type I've been tryin' to figure that out Been givin' myself to girls that I should've never allowed Come into my life, but I can't stand feelin' lonely, I count Out multiple situationships wreckin' my future vows I wanna throw in the towel, throwin' away my life and my future to stay aroused Havin' someone into me makes me forget all my doubts But then once you're into me, I then intimately head out I just say it wouldn't work out, I'm selfish, okay I've been livin' this way since 13, it's been a decade of hurting I cover my pain, while flirting with life, till it burns me I call and tell God I'm hurting, don't hear an answer, think surely I'm goin' to hell while lurkin', in sun all over again I don't learn my lessons, 24-year-old still stuck in adolescence This thorn in my side has now turned to an obsession Been somethin' I can't confess, well, I guess this is my confession I guess this counts as progression, right I can't help I'm enticed, I can't help out when girls are into me I gotta try to make it work, cause I feel like I am not worth it You're not perfect, this is somethin' I know But always convince myself I'm worthless I'm not certain of what I want, it's the only thing I'm sure of I always feel insecure, and need constant reassurance I know you think that you want me, but you don't know all my burdens There's a lot of things no one knows, I keep hid behind the curtain Got some things you don't wanna see, most of y'all think I'm clean Know you think that I'm safe, and I never been off the leash I surprise you, I got baggage, I'm not bragging, I'm just like you Had my fair share of the apple and the bondage I was tied to things I should've never seen Some girls I always call When I was feeling lonely, that I know I should've dropped Some things I revert back to, cause I know I'm never caught Admit my lust is my addiction, not too proud to say it's not A problem that I struggle with, I struggle till I gotten to the point Of no return it turn I feel like I'm forgotten By my Lord and Savior, my behavior's gotta have some consequences Coming my way, but know I'm not ready for them yet