So Close Yet So Far

I really don't know how to process My emotions take over and it's a vest Filling the weight of my chest Something i'll be feeling next I dont get why im feeling this way Using the vest to hold my heart in Loving is a whole different compartment Something where i couldnt touch it Only reached once by a girl It was so dark yet i felt alive Oh my god she took my heart And i turned to a freedive Bottled up emotions Took a new high (damn) Too much to process, They give me too much problems I don't wanna lie But i had to save her life So i had to die Emotionally i've never felt alive (what) This aint corny just seen shit It's been immortalised Its morals being built up on deaths She wouldn't get Cause she aint seen one death (what) Bunch a cap, lying is apart of the process I'm so close yet I'm so far I'm close with yall who's in it? Enemies pack in it Who's side yall in yet Fore i bat out some disses Don't get it twisted im deadly with it I don't use guns i like stabbing my victims While yall turn away I'll clean up and dig yall graves To yall who take any sides To yall who think they real No women yous a fake To yall when i tap my drac To yall who just here to take To yall who out for blood Something i don't like turn and run To yall who tried to stay I gave my life to stay I gave my life to stay Ive done 15 suicides Something that god would let slide How selfish can you be Making your family living with grief How can you sit here and just be She is lying, what for? I don't need no henny to see Something you wanted to be But cant get yet, so What was you meant to be Mummy raised a failure Bet daddy wouldn't like a naming What i didn't do dat What type of man dissing another mans son That'll be me I couldn't be giving anything out for three If you paid for one then oh maybe How can you leave and still see some greed You fake wait and see Missing out on me like Thanks baby Man shut yo dumbass up Snort your lines and hit that md I dont respect people like you I keep it a hundo I stay like a huncho Run with my gun tho Knives still the first run tho Planned a whole lot tho But it only took one month So what was you planning to be? What was you planning to be? So what was you planning to be? What was you planning to be? I mean one day at a time i guess So some will wait and see I aint waiting cause i aint mess wit you Cause i'm turning to a private mc What was you planning to be? Gotta be something worth energy What was you planning to be? Career planned or some fein What was you meant to be? A escort, stuck out in a club What were you planning to be? An apprentice hoping to make dad happy What did you turn out like Drugged out pike Hopping her drink is spiked Rape, no way just a lie So tell me What was you planning to be?