Praying To A God

Hey mom, where you at now You see your baby boy's all grown up Keep on watching from a distance That social media shit's getting old I was looking for answers at the bottom of every bottle Before I popped out the question, they answered it with a motto Said I'd never make it if I live on the edge of my past Now I'm hoping I can change it if I ever get the chance You thought that I fell off when I just lost the motivation Yeah, I said it before, but I found the path laid out with pavement Now I'm back in my lane and I ain't returning to the basement Born to be one of the greatest, something my father had stated Something my mother reiterated every day From the phone calls in her cell to the letters I heard her pray To a God she don't believe in, but maybe her son he'd save Little did she know it was me that would turn away Now she's begging for forgiveness for the sacrifice she made But I'll never give in again, I'ma take it to the grave I've been begging for forgiveness for a decade and you strayed Now I'm on my own alone with the family here that I made And I'm praying to a God I don't believe in for the same All in hope that he'd listen or take a message, but he didn't I've been questioning why ever since you left me here to finish By the end of my life I hope that I'm not the one who did it Praying to a God I don't believe in for the same All in hope that he'd listen or take a message, but he didn't I've been questioning why ever since you left me here to finish By the end of my life I hope that I'm not the one who did it What we started when I was only a kid with a vision First I asked you for the truth, now I'll dare you in the kitchen That I turned into a booth when I was looking for a witness If you count out the minutes you'd see I doubted my limits Might have cut my chance in half, now I'll double it with stitches The old me's dead and gone with life two simple incisions I know I said it once before, now I'm the predator and victim Cause I've been killing myself, if you'd listen then you would get it Like the lies that you told about all the bands that you stole When I was a kid on the run, I was trying to find my soul I was homeless half a decade, you could check my receipts Got a couple dozen spots, I know that I could go to sleep Cause my thoughts are always haunting my conscience I'm in a prism, not a prison A vision that was twisted by my kin when I was little Now if life's a bitch, I'll leave her in a couple ditches Chopped up and screwed, feed her organs to the fishes Praying to a God I don't believe in for the same All in hope that he'd listen or take a message but he didn't I've been questioning why ever since you left me here to finish By the end of my life I hope that I'm not the one who did it Praying to a God I don't believe in for the same All in hope that he'd listen or take a message but he didn't I've been questioning why ever since you left me here to finish By the end of my life I hope that I'm not the one who did it