Airplane Mode

Speech delayed, I’m in Airplane Mode This is what I was given, wasn’t a life I chose Feeling like a human Rollie ‘cause my time is froze Beautiful soul, yet fragile like a diamond rose My heart can only take so much, from all these blows I be stressin’ but f*ck it, can’t let nobody know I’m they go-to, so I can’t let this part of me show Always dressed up in smiles when I’m in parties though I wish life was more E-Z, so they’d lemme pass If only y’all all really knew where my head be at My mind be on another world, I always mention that Still, nobody ever yet tried to question that Feel like I hoop against my home team and I’m second cap They discarded my seasoning to find a better pack Treated our bond like old toys how they severed that Is it because they hate me, or they’re threatened fast? Would you believe me if I told you I be tryna cry? I be swearin’ I’m a phoenix, I ain’t tryna die I be lyrically soarin’, but I’m tryna fly Fake n****s Harley-Davidsons, how they tryna ride To learn my business and take me down, like swattin’ flies And for that reason alone, I keep a lot inside Always look for light in people’s eyes, I ain’t stoppin’ shine People are temporary, good looks for stoppin’ by Colder than February, Valentine’s broken heart Always felt like people ignored my spoken art If I press reboot I’ma just have a slow restart Tried to prevent it but deep down, we’ll grow apart Go our separate way, more options he weigh I’m thinkin’ maybe if a n***a stay that’s better pay Tryna hold it down with more strength, need better spray Even if they throw me into the fray, for them I pray Survival of the fittest, gotta hunt or be hunted Will I catch they bad vibes? I bet they wonder I’ll give everyone the world while mine fallin’ under Human shield, I always wind up as somebody cover I always been too nice, been told that since a youngin’ I was never into arguin’, that shit exhaustin’ People chat to be heard, they missing the importance They darken good deeds, and brighten misfortunes They always show me two sides, that’s word to my mother Flippin’ sides more than coins, they can’t wait to toss me Must be highlight reels, some can’t wait to cross me Once I was handed that L, that’s when they lost me No matter who I link, I keep my pain chillin’ If we relate we’re in sync, call that a pain spillin’ Illustratin’ with ink, I call it pain spillin’ I usually write what I think, never what I’m feelin’ If I all do is exist, am I truly livin’? Honestly speakin’, many problems tried to fix ‘em Always deaded arguments to fix issues with quickness Most likely tried too late, too late for forgiveness The way I used to give my all, you would think it’s Christmas What we do is what we do, nobody’s business Through the grape vine it was sickened, thanks to the system People focus on the destroyin’, and never buildin’ True friends my witness, tired of being slandered Tired of being looked at as toxic, I’m no hazard For those who think I put myself first, you thinkin’ backwards I treat it like a job to know n****s ain’t feelin’ battered I always work to make people smile, keep ‘em flattered But when it was time for my one call, nobody answered Came to terms with the fact I ain’t anyone’s standard Sometimes I be really wishin’, time never mattered Down this road I go alone, I’m travelin’ with patience Many mixed emotions but of course that been my fragrance All these thoughts and emotions, you hear it in my cadence Brought up some senses, to make sure you feel vibrations I turned my phone’s notes, into a diary Where my unreleased heat, is under ‘Privacy’ I love who I shouldn’t care about, that’s the irony Took my phone off Do Not Disturb, here’s the private me