What Right Did I Have

Boiling myself in the shower Trying to distill all this self-loathing from my skin Water gets hotter but it just pools on this shitty goatee When I look in Riding that negative derivative The second doesn't look any more positive I could look back at any day and send A message to my past self "It'll never be this good again" I miss Joe, and I miss Dan I miss Tony, I miss my man I live in a desert but the only thing dried is my hope And I'm sick of wasting energy I don't need to understand 'Cause living up to myself's not like his firm grip on my hand My parent's are now concerned and I know that you are too I hate to make them nervous, I hate doing this to you And I've know for a long time what all my problems are But I'm in too deep it's just too much for me and this guitar