Missing

Might be the realest shit That I've ever wrote I wouldn't wanna see my kids selling coke You're like sixty now,  you're getting old But this story here was never told I was three, little bro was one Mum packed her bags and left to go From her Yorkshire home to a London road She brought her kids and left alone And like that we was left alone I didn't like that Years passed and we never spoke Birthdays was the worst days, you never wrote I'd sit and stare at the telephone Used to ring you, there was no answer Always thought you was never home The pain I felt you would never know You said you'd meet me at primary school I'd tell all my friends but you'd never show Mum was working them late nights and never Once did you send her dough All I wanted was a pair of Nikes All I wanted was to hear advice So rarely did I hear your voice By eleven I'd let him go Never once did you pick me up Said you'd visit but never once in my Whole life did you visit us Never once did you give a f*ck You wouldn't care if I was living bruck Remember nights I was in the mud You was probably drinking in a pub There ain't a thing you've given us Situation all crazy my Pops from Liverpool And reverted in the late 80's Before he married my mother Before she had me or my brother I've seen photos of you in Pakistan I don't know much about my father's past I spent more time at my grandma's yard More than seven years since We've exchanged some words Before then it was eight years To make it worse I've seen you twice in fifteen years My childhood, you was missing there What's the reason you disappeared? Moving forward, switching gears Flashbacks through my lifetime Flashbacks up in my mind Back when I was young yute Before I got up on my grind I used to go Barratts for school shoes Mum would give me like £30 Lighting ganja, imma burn it down What's the reason you weren't around? I could understand if you was locked up Got a thirty, done a bird I could understand if you was catted out Bunning work but you weren't I could understand if you was overseas and Settled down with a new wife But these times you was up in Leeds And never gave your two yutes time I always thought I got a Half-brother or sister out there I don't know it Mum would cuss me and say you're like your Father but these times I don't know him A lot of single mothers on their heal But your absence made me stronger still All I wanted was an explanation I never had no expectation All them years that you left me waiting I don't think there's nothing Left to say then Real talk, you made your bed to lay in