the art of disappearing

Another pill another day Wipe away the tears that stain, tell myself to bury it Was I born to feel this way Do I have a purpose but to run from some oblivion And at night I can't sleep I think that when I wake up I will somehow be invisible So many secrets that I keep Would it even matter if one day I wasn't there at all I'm scared to breathe Scared I'll open up and then one day you'll leave I'm scared to love Give myself to you and find I'm not enough Made it through another week Sell myself an empty promise that I will feel better soon My mood is low, and then it peaks I will myself to find some hope, something that will get me through And I drink just to get high Every drop that's past my lips will fade away my yesterdays Something's dying deep inside Twenty years seems far too long of feeling I am still a waste I'm scared to breathe Scared I'll open up and then one day you'll leave I'm scared to love Give myself to you and find I'm not enough I'm scared to breathe After everything I'm ripping at the seams I'm scared to love Didn't kill me but I'm still not strong enough Will you stay Stay right here I know one day I'll have no fear