The Subtlety of Lies

Small smile I am fine No need to express that I'm not All the while It's the lies I told myself deep in the box You tell me to calm my shit But you're not around to help it Spiraling down I can't stop it You just bolt when it gets intense At your convenience I showed too much lenience Giving you my only weakness It gets too real And you just quit The common harbor for your ship You tell me to calm my shit But you're not around to help it Spiraling down I can't stop it You just bolt when it gets intense Left at the altar, guess I'm not worth the time I always falter, but that's me at my best I dropped the ball, never been my sport I lost it all, one my failure I guess You think you got me pinned That my will is spent But you just pretend To be along until the end You cause more harm than you fix I'm stuck in park while you begin to drift Into my problems with no plan I just wish that you'd understand The only time you're needed Is when I'm down and beaten Prostrated and prone as I'm curled Broken by this fucking world I thought I couldn't survive without you by my side But goddamn it, I'm telling myself fucking lies You tell me to calm my shit But you're not around to help it Spiraling now I can't stop it You just bolt when it gets intense You tell me to calm my shit You tell me to calm my shit You tell me to calm my shit But you're not around to help it