So Close (Almost There Pt. 2)

Get up eight times if you fall seven Goin through hell just tryna get to heaven If you have ten I gotta get eleven There is no question, 7-17 reppin', lessons Better learn em, there's no room for guessin' Nor stressin', I'm countin the blessin's Stone Cold when I'm wrestlin' No rearview cause I'm not backin' up Wired like an EV you can't gas me up I thought I knew love but I'm so bad at love Thought I had to do extra like I'm not enough I'm speakin' blunt like we used to stay blunted Now I'm back to growin', sad my growth was stunted Gotta pay me back, it all times a hundred Pedal to the metal, So Close and I want it So close to the edge that I'm pushed accidentally Voices in my head and they're not friendly to me Ever since I was young they would just scream at me Sayin' so many things they were just mean to me I had to learn how to channel dark energy Now the money is the only new friend to me I'm the supplier and you are all fiends to me I battle demons, you're just human beings to me And that's not a fight We all got guns niggha you got a knife I feel like David, I know my Goliath Look, I'm self aware and myself I inspire To be or not to be, my toes at the fire Still I'm not singin', I'm not in a choir Assessin' the situation and it's dire Back against the wall, it's down to the wire So close to the edge that I might just jump off Cause I already feel like I'm in a free fall Started walkin' tall, it ended in a crawl And now I don't feel like I wanna go on So close to the fire I feel like I'm bacon Chop up the piggy's, the money just rake in Not coppin' one piglet at least two I'm takin Not thinkin' about the time I could be facin' And that's how it be Momma told me that she not proud of me She told me she raised me better than to be Another statistic, I just wanna eat Check the ballistics, the bullets wiped clean Movin' in silence, lasagna, a G Sauced up, all about the bread and the cheese Meatier pockets, fam, that's all I need Dressed in all black, I'm the furthest from emo Peelin' caps back I'm much closer to chemo This not Shake Ya Ass music, this is not P-Lo This is some Fck You, this is more CeeLo Pistol in my lap, no one ridin' shotgun Me myself and I, myself is the hot one She don't want a bytch so thank God I'm not one She want a mans man, told her friends that she got one It's like I'm a prize Can tell a real smile by lookin' at eyes It might be a mask that I put on to hide It might be a front, I'm good with the facade Told Momma I'm good, sorry Momma I lied Wrote her a letter, said Momma I tried Told her don't cry, as I wrote it I cried Said it's not your fault, don't know how to say bye Blood on the walls, Mad Max keepin' a tally Hand to hand combat, I'm good in the alley Afterwards to relax I hit up Towelie Playin the Long game, so I feel like Howie No chef but I put in work in the kitchen Makin' my shawty some veggies and chicken She tell me I'm dry, she ask why I'm distant She said you can tell me, said "Baby I'll listen" So close to the edge that I'm pushed accidentally Voices in my head and they're not friendly to me Ever since I was young they would just scream at me Sayin' so many things they were just mean to me So close to the edge that I might just jump off Cause I already feel like I'm in a free fall Started walkin' tall, it ended in a crawl And now I don't feel like I wanna go on