Stocking Envy (alternate version)

It's tea time Let’s cut straight to the chase, you’ve been cheating on me With this bitch in these big sexy stockings But every night after work I eat Cheetos with a bag Every morning you wake up to a wrinkly old hag You didn’t think I’d notice, how stupid could I be Not stupid, but jealous, I got stocking envy Her calves look so fine I got stocking envy Ask her if she bought them online I got stocking envy Let’s get right to the point, you’re married You’ve been spending all this coin to dress me In these itchy itchy stockings, Gary Cause every night after work you send me a text message It usually says something like “hey where are you headed” Can’t believe the truth took this long to see Not stupid, just hurting (I got stocking envy) My calves look do look kinda good in these (I got stocking envy) Amazon 15.99 (No way! oh I got stocking envy) Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me But every night going to sleep you’re not laying with me I don’t know what I did that karma seems to fucking hate me I’d give it all up for some normalcy F*ck Christmas, I hate it I got stocking envy Why would you lie to her Can't you see I am hurt? You lied to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me to me Merry fucking Christmas to me