Contemplation

I've been searching on my own Found no place to call my home Been so long since I felt happy Ain't nobody gonna save me I doubt my purpose a lot I get lost in my thoughts I have insecurities I've been through a lot But haven't we all, always putting up a fight Everybody's suffering, you just wanna die Lay alone at night wiping your tears as you cry Drowning in your thoughts, wondering why Do I really deserve this I know I'm not perfect But I try my best, my life's a mess Been feeling like my heart's on house arrest Nothing makes sense I don't know how to feel My heart keeps lying to me I don't know what's real Guess I'll cover my ears and shut my mouth I get it, you don't wanna hear me out Nobody listens to what I'm saying This is just my contemplation I've been searching on my own Found no place to call my home Been so long since I felt happy Ain't nobody gonna save me I went ghost so long people thought I was gone A real ghost roaming around 'til I dropped this song What's wrong, it's too late now You had your chance before, now I'm moving along Ghosting all my socials, you didn't notice Working on my album, I had to focus Contemplating should I leave again Gonna disappear like, would you notice then It's really not your business who I'm messing with You had your chance before, but now I'm over it Been spending all this time contemplating What I should and shouldn't do I kinda hate it I don't know if I'm gonna make it Is my life important, should I save it I don't know who I should be engaged with I have friends but are they faking it I really feel like everyone's pretending When you look in the mirror do you fit it Are you happy with the life that your living Okay I'm done now, I'm gonna end it I've been searching on my own Found no place to call my home Been so long since I felt happy Ain't nobody gonna save me