21 Minutes

January one, twenty fifteen I spent twenty one minutes standing over my sink Bathroom door locked; hands open palms up A razor blade next to me I'd had enough The bloodstains on my bathroom sink Self-portraits of all my mistakes Like failed attempts at second breaks All spiraled down the drain Heard someone screaming through the door Like muffled static, I ignored While I traced circles in my blood Waiting to be a corpse My eyes heavy as the sun As I close them one last time and fade into oblivion I fell; a bloody shirt against the wall That's when they broke the door down Carried me away Six months before, I'd built a wall Each brick a smile everyone saw Behind it crying, so alone No comfort in a comfort zone Tried to escape, fell every time But scraped fingernails make bloody lines Which trickled down into my eyes Colorized my vision; I lost sight Of what was right Cause when you spend your life in darkness You'll adapt until your blind, and you think That nothing can change But I guarantee that Nothing ever stays the same So don't do it Cause you're worth it And I guarantee that you won't always feel this way So hold on Don't let go Just take a breath cause everything will be ok September twenty third, twenty fifteen I spent twenty one minutes standing over my sink Bathroom door locked, hands open palms up The scars on my wrists reminders That I was always more than enough