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(One, two, three, four) Why does it feel selfish to care? When they're right there Why be defensive if he can make you better than I ever could? And I know you want them more than me Wish you'd told me the truth because I'm desperately Clinging on to the past, missing all that you were Missing all that he was, I confess (I'm still moving on) I flinch at the sirens as they pass me by Couple scars on my skull from a Tuesday in my mind I'll replay it if I want to, don't recreate it till you come to So I'll be hanging by a thread, watching my pitiful descent Let me find somewhere to rest, then I'll call you It's been a while since we last talked, and cared about the words we said It's been a while since the outset, when will we reach page 99? How does it feel to fall apart in slow motion? (And get picked back up) And was it real when you told me I'm third place? That I could be replaced? And I spend my days searching for a remedy Because God knows I could use it for you as well as me And you deserve better I promise I can be better So I'll be hanging by a thread, watching my pitiful descent Let me find somewhere to rest, then I'll call you It's been a while since we last talked, and cared about the words we said It's been a while since the outset, when will we reach page 99? (Wake up, wake up) Cause it's all so repetitive I know that I'll never live past 18 I'd trade my blood and tears for a sedative My strategy's a spiral but at least it's reliable Keeps me deniable so sign me up I love you, I hate you, one day I might break you Just trying to say what fills my cortex So cut my veins and my arteries Cut away each part of me Cause I can't do it Go on and hang me by my thread, and watch my long-awaited end Been left high and dry enough, so I won't call you anymore It's been a while since we last talked, and cared about the words we said Take me back to the outset, take me back, or take me out