mimicry

It's really hard, it's really hard How do you get across four years of trauma in just a single line A single song lyric How do you get across How do you get it across with the proper delivery, and the performance It's just so much pent-up years of anger, sadness, grief, and Guess respect is lost, 'cause we're not focused on the same point Manipulate this to your liking with every phrase coined Bridges gotta burn, 'cause we detach from the main point Lookin' at my double, like two sides of the same coin Insecurities intertwined in a web of lies, seamlessly Rhythmic drilling in the skull keeping me awake ceaselessly Impossible yearning, craving what I cannot have needlessly Painting a thousand strokes to reform oneself, ingeniously The effort is tangled A reset often means disturbed returns to prior angles Hyper aware and conscious of the mirrored adolescent It takes death to respect what is living in the present Uncomfortably sentient of my existence and how it burdens me Every single mood swing feels like a merciless emergency Awake at 4 AM staring at my own reflection Isolation in an ocean, I'm forced in every direction Plagued by what I can't resolve, so I'm tainted and distorted Humility is clear when my own echoed image is contorted The concept of true love is something that I've never known When I learn to love myself, I guess I'll stop being alone Mesmerized in a fashion in which I cannot speak Delusional depictions make me feel utterly weak I'm looking at you, cracked; appearance messy and askew Knowing that the only person wanting you to die is you The cold hand of Death loves the way your body curves Everything you do illustrates your undying nerves Daily derealization and embracing disembodiment Learning how to love hate, self-destruction embodying Guess respect is lost, 'cause we're not focused on the same point Manipulate this to your liking with every phrase coined Bridges gotta burn, 'cause we detach from the main point Lookin' at my double, like two sides of the same coin And at the very top, where he was alone, but not alone He pulled back his string and he tightened his bow And said nothing at all, just breathed And held it, a moment, and then let everything go I pull myself through the glass and recognize me as evil I keep malice inside to stop hurting other people Perfection's an illusion and yet it's what you ask of me Deep commitment sets everybody up for agony I'm a stranger in my skin, I detest how I perceive it Punching crystalline until I bleed, I'm not bothered to clean it You necessitate a filter, love; you are not unbridled I'm a walking corpse, to what life am I entitled Treat me like a pawn, all I want to ask is how could you You made me feel so stupid for doing what a kid would do Tears stain pale cheeks on a cold night in October Haven't spoken to you yet, already know that it's over Using your moral high ground to accelerate the pressure I'm surrounded by people, yet I feel more alone than ever Egotistic power trip, like, who gave you the right to choose If I could go back in time, you can bet that I'd still lie to you I've been traumatized for four fucking years of my life I try to let it go, but I still remember in spite I hate how I acted, I hate how I felt Consequences left me haunted, now I hate myself Eyes everywhere on me, now each sense is alert When you go to Hell, you'll live with the people that you hurt Atmosphere drenched in misery, future feeling ominous The side of you that I loathe to espouse is my death consciousness