Televisionary (He Hung Himself In A Public Bathroo

`He was discovered early this morning by former co-workers in a publicbathroom at his former workplace. It was revealed by the police that he hadbeen there since Thursday evening. It is presumed that he choose that datebecause of the extended weekend to provide an extra day of decaying before hewould be discovered. The body was found naked, with all major arteries slashedand as is the case with most hangings, both the body's bowels and blather gaveout. It was revealed through forensics that he was also covered in vomit,caused by having swallowed rotten milk presumably on purpose, and semen fromhaving masturbated one last time before using the blade to mutilate hisgenitals and along with his whole body to cause as much blood as possible tocome out. One can safely assume that he wanted to be found covered in as manyvital fluids as possible when he would be discovered. Co-workers described thesight, and especially the smell, to be intolerable and are noted as being inneed of immediate psychiatric help as a result of making this gruesomediscovery and were all sent home from work to try and recover…`