Water Cooler Suicide (He Hung Himself In A Public

That's how I want it to end. A footnote on the back of a crappy newspaper, ashort report by some faggot with a bad comb over on the morning news. Somethingeveryone would discuss that day at work and start their day off thinking aboutthe uselessness of their own existence. A real water cooler suicide. If youwant to be remembered, you have to go out with a bang, people judge a storysolely on it's ending. You have to give them what they want, blood, sex andcontroversy. The more embarrassing the better! Most people can't remember thesinger from INXS' name, but we all know he was found in a hotel room hangingfrom his own belt with his limp dick in hand as a result of an over zealousgame of autoerotic asphyxiation. If he only managed to cum a bit faster, hemight still be alive and we'd probably all have forgotten about him by now. Hehas attained the status of a legend through one final, disgusting,self-gratifying, quasi-suicidal, carnal act. It doesn't matter what youaccomplish in life, as long as you give them something to talk about when youdie. I want to be remembered for one single stupidity I committed, andcompletely forgotten for who I really was.