New Beginnings

I broke down in tears when I lost my best friend Then I lost my bitch, the spiral came Lost control of who I was but then I realized that this pain Is just an illusion, this life is confusing My heart is bruising while I'm cruising on the 101 Searching for answers I can find Turn one eye the others blind, say I'm feeling fine When that's another lie, I do it all the time I'm searching for a new beginning I've been feeling like I got more layers I gotta get to peeling Like a switch emotions, I'm concealing I switch it when I need a bitch, I cannot be Cover who I am, no canopy, I candidly Tell you how I feel, truth be told I wish I could go back and do it again Then reflection settles in I learn from my mistakes I'm learning what it takes To be the man I've tried to be I know it takes time, I know it's a grind I know it and I'm hoping that I can show up and find The recipe, I'm blessed to be alive I'm blessed to be alive You wouldn't understand the shit that I've been going through But I do my best to express How depressed, I've been impressing myself Invest in my health Infested thoughts that I've dealt with They say that I'm selfish Bitch, I can't help it Bitch, I can't help it Maybe I'm helpless And on this road I find I've been so damn blind Blinded by the optimism I promise in due time They say that I should stop right now But I don't see a sign You don't gotta worry about me Promise I'll be fine