44 Robbers

I got up at half past four Forty-four robbers around my door Forty-four - and maybe more What the hell they want me for? Stubbly faces & gap-tooth grins Ain`t no way I`m lettin` them in No way - you can`t come in Forty-four robbers stinkin` of gin Uh huh - I ain`t lettin` you in I`ll hit you with a rolling pin So small can`t hurt a fly Get in my way and I`ll sure as hell try To kick your butt down the block Can`t wait yellin` for the cops Fifty dealers and fifty thieves Starring at the drive-in on my street Shit, over my shoulder there`s Popeye and Bluto Looking nasty - can I remember my judo? It`s always like this - going out alone So damn scared might never leave home I`ve got my freedom I`ve got my pride All means nothin` with these men outside Puffing and preening and strutting their stuff Blocking my way out - I`ve had enough! Give me justice - hand it over now Gotta get a gun or maybe just leave town... See ya! Sly Stallone and Al Capone Are giving me grief on the telephone All I want is a Swiss cheese sarnie When at the deli stands big Arnie Hey Jean-Claude - move aside That taxi`s mine - I`m taking that ride When I go out to get the Sunday paper What`s my man to think `someone might rape her`?! I`m just having a beer on my own Don`t mean Hulk Hogan can take me home I`ve got my mace but my loud-as-f*ck whistle Is so ineffective I just pray the Epistles For help to come someday soon But until then I`ll stay in my room